Whereas,

despite all earnest negotiations, demands, and pleas, Reality does not conform to the dictates and beliefs laid down by conceptual reasoning, and persistently demonstrates defiance to expectations founded upon esteemed and solemn wishes; And whereas Reality, holder of all power to determine actuality, withholds unconditional happiness and usurps the self ordained right to impose personal conditions on the whole; I hereby declare a state of war, and authorize and direct all mental resources to impeach, resist, and sabotage any attempts by Reality to subjugate cerebral authority, and condone and commend all calamity and suffering resultant of said righteous struggle.

Sworn, witnessed, and mandated by this the Sovereign State of My Mind.

* * * * *

Coming inevitably:

Declaration of My Unconditional Surrender